Welcome to the wild and wonderful world of parenthood! It's a journey filled with sleepless nights, endless love, and a whole lot of… well, choices. That's where Would You Rather Questions For New Parents come in. These fun, thought-provoking, and sometimes hilarious prompts are a fantastic way to break the ice, get to know fellow parents, or even just amuse yourselves during a quiet moment (if such a thing exists!).
The Joy and Purpose of Parent Dilemmas
So, what exactly are these "Would You Rather Questions For New Parents"? Think of them as mini-scenarios where you have to pick between two often equally challenging or amusing options. They aren't about finding the "right" answer, but rather about exploring different perspectives and sharing a laugh. They’re incredibly popular because, let’s be honest, parenting throws you curveballs you never saw coming, and these questions tap into that shared experience of navigating the unexpected.
These questions are used in a bunch of ways. They're great icebreakers at new parent groups, perfect for passing the time during long car rides, or even as a fun way to chat with your partner about your parenting styles and expectations. They can spark:
- Laughter and lightheartedness
- Discussions about priorities
- Insights into your partner's thinking
- A sense of shared struggle and triumph
The importance of these questions lies in their ability to connect people through shared experiences and to remind us that we're not alone in this parenting adventure. They offer a playful way to consider the many facets of raising a child, from the mundane to the monumental.
Sleep Deprivation Survival: Would You Rather?
- Would you rather have your baby wake you up every hour on the hour for the first month, or have them sleep soundly through the night but only wake you up with a loud, piercing scream at exactly 3:17 AM every single day?
- Would you rather constantly smell like sour milk, or have your baby's burps echo like a trumpet blast every time they hiccup?
- Would you rather only be able to sleep in 5-minute increments, or have one full night's sleep every two weeks?
- Would you rather have to sing a lullaby in a different opera voice each time you put the baby down, or have to perform a complex dance routine to soothe them?
- Would you rather wake up with a full beard every morning, or have your hair turn a different neon color each day?
- Would you rather your baby only cry when you’re on an important phone call, or have them only cry when you’re trying to eat a hot meal?
- Would you rather have to wear adult diapers yourself so you don't have to get up, or have your baby wear a diaper that leaks at the most inconvenient moments?
- Would you rather have a baby that cries only when you're trying to watch your favorite show, or a baby that cries only when you're trying to have a conversation with an adult?
- Would you rather have your baby projectile vomit on you once a day, or have them constantly spit up tiny amounts that dampen all your clothes?
- Would you rather have to change diapers blindfolded, or have to swaddle the baby with oven mitts on?
- Would you rather only be able to communicate with your baby through interpretive dance, or only through singing country music songs?
- Would you rather have your baby insist on wearing a superhero cape to every doctor's appointment, or have them demand to be carried everywhere like royalty?
- Would you rather have to explain your parenting choices to a panel of toddlers every day, or have to negotiate with your baby for every nap?
- Would you rather your baby's first word be "taxes," or your baby's first word be "mortgage"?
- Would you rather have to change diapers in a public restroom with no changing table, or have your baby poop during your most important Zoom meeting?
- Would you rather have your baby always smell like onions, or have them always smell like gym socks?
- Would you rather have to sing the alphabet backward every time you soothe your baby, or have to tell them a different fairy tale in a squeaky voice?
- Would you rather have your baby only sleep when you're reading them an instruction manual, or only when you're reciting Shakespeare?
- Would you rather have to walk around with a permanently sticky hand, or have your baby leave glitter everywhere they go?
- Would you rather your baby only laugh when you make a silly face, or only cry when you're trying to relax?
Feeding Frenzy: Would You Rather?
- Would you rather exclusively breastfeed but only be able to do it in a public park, or exclusively bottle-feed but have the bottles always be slightly too cold?
- Would you rather your baby only eat pureed broccoli, no matter what, or your baby only eat pureed cauliflower, no matter what?
- Would you rather have to prepare all baby food from scratch using only ingredients you've grown yourself, or have your baby only eat food that's been blessed by a celebrity chef?
- Would you rather have your baby demand to be fed at the exact moment you sit down to eat your own meal, or have them refuse to eat unless you're singing them a song about food?
- Would you rather have to spoon-feed your baby a single pea for an hour, or have them try to feed themselves and fling food everywhere?
- Would you rather your baby only drink water that's been infused with your tears, or only drink milk that’s been stirred with a tiny unicorn horn?
- Would you rather have your baby develop an intense dislike for all fruits, or all vegetables?
- Would you rather have to burp your baby using only interpretive dance, or only by reciting poetry?
- Would you rather your baby only want to eat food that’s been shaped like animals, or only food that's been arranged in geometric patterns?
- Would you rather have to eat every meal with your baby, forcing you to eat whatever they're eating, or have your baby eat whatever you're eating, and they're incredibly picky?
- Would you rather have your baby be a picky eater who only eats beige food, or a baby who eats anything but always throws it on the floor?
- Would you rather have to make a different, elaborate meal for your baby every single night, or have to convince your baby to eat the same bland meal every night?
- Would you rather your baby prefer to eat off your plate than their own, or your baby prefer to eat food that’s been left out for at least 24 hours?
- Would you rather have to answer "What's for dinner?" in 10 different languages every day, or have your baby only eat food that you’ve personally named?
- Would you rather your baby only want to eat when you’re telling them a made-up story, or only when you’re doing a magic trick?
- Would you rather have to feed your baby with a tiny doll-sized spoon, or have them feed themselves with a giant ladle?
- Would you rather your baby have an aversion to all things sweet, or an aversion to all things savory?
- Would you rather have to sing a jingle for every bite of food you give your baby, or have to make a silly sound effect for each bite?
- Would you rather your baby prefer to eat their food upside down, or your baby prefer to eat their food while hanging upside down?
- Would you rather have to blend all your own food into a smoothie for your baby to drink, or have your baby only eat food that’s been dipped in something unusual (like ketchup on everything)?
Potty Training Pandemonium: Would You Rather?
- Would you rather have your child exclusively pee on the floor, or exclusively poop in their pants at precisely 4:00 PM every day?
- Would you rather have your child declare they've "gone potty" every time they fart, or every time they cough?
- Would you rather have to teach your child to potty train using only interpretive dance, or only by singing opera?
- Would you rather have your child insist on wearing their diaper on their head after they're potty trained, or have them refuse to use the toilet unless it’s been decorated with glitter and stickers?
- Would you rather have to celebrate every single successful potty trip with a parade, or have to give your child a gold star sticker for every successful potty trip, even if they’ve already had 100?
- Would you rather have your child only be willing to use the potty if a specific stuffed animal is sitting next to them, or only if you're wearing a clown nose?
- Would you rather have your child ask to go potty every 3 minutes for an entire day, or only ask once when they desperately need to go, but at the most inconvenient time?
- Would you rather have your child accidentally potty train the dog, or have your child think the toilet is a magical portal to another dimension?
- Would you rather have to sing a song about pee and poop every time you go to the potty, or have to tell a joke before every potty attempt?
- Would you rather your child only want to potty train if you’re wearing a princess dress, or if you’re wearing a superhero costume?
- Would you rather have your child leave a "surprise" in their underwear every time you're out in public, or have them refuse to wear underwear altogether?
- Would you rather have to chase your child around the house singing "Gotta Go Potty" with a tambourine, or have to bribe them with an entire bag of candy for every successful flush?
- Would you rather your child believe that the potty monster lives in the toilet and eats accidents, or that the toilet is a gateway to space travel?
- Would you rather have to give your child a dramatic standing ovation for every successful pee, or a ticker-tape parade for every successful poop?
- Would you rather your child insist on wearing their potty on their head like a hat, or their potty on their feet like shoes?
- Would you rather have to read them a bedtime story about the importance of hygiene every night for the next year, or have them tell you a story about their potty adventures every morning?
- Would you rather your child only want to go potty when the TV is on, but only during commercials, or only when you’re singing at the top of your lungs?
- Would you rather have to clean up "accidents" with a tiny toothbrush, or have to write a formal apology letter to the toilet every time they miss?
- Would you rather your child only want to potty train if they're wearing a cape, or if they're wearing a crown?
- Would you rather have to reward every potty success with a fireworks display, or have to write a thank-you note to the toilet every time they use it?
Behavioral Bafflement: Would You Rather?
- Would you rather your child have a loud, boisterous laugh that echoes through the house at all hours, or a quiet, persistent whimper that you can never quite locate?
- Would you rather your child constantly ask "Why?" 100 times an hour, or constantly interrupt you by singing random songs?
- Would you rather your child have the energy of a thousand caffeinated squirrels, or the moodiness of a teenage drama queen?
- Would you rather your child insist on wearing mismatched socks every day for the rest of their life, or insist on dressing up as a pirate every single day?
- Would you rather have your child always speak in riddles, or always speak in rhymes?
- Would you rather your child decide they are a cat and meow at everyone they meet, or decide they are a dog and bark at everyone they meet?
- Would you rather your child have a habit of "borrowing" things from strangers and bringing them home, or have a habit of giving away all your possessions to strangers?
- Would you rather your child only communicate through dramatic sighs, or through dramatic eye-rolls?
- Would you rather have your child constantly perform impromptu magic shows that always go wrong, or constantly tell elaborate jokes that no one understands?
- Would you rather your child believe that vegetables are poisonous and refuse to eat them, or believe that candy is a vital food group and demand it all the time?
- Would you rather your child decide they are a robot and only speak in monotone robot voices, or decide they are a superhero and try to fly off the furniture?
- Would you rather have your child have a tendency to hug strangers a little too enthusiastically, or a tendency to tell strangers your deepest secrets?
- Would you rather your child insist on walking backward everywhere they go, or insist on crawling everywhere they go?
- Would you rather have your child decide that they are a king or queen and demand to be served at all times, or decide that they are a scientist and conduct experiments on everything?
- Would you rather your child have a habit of collecting only lost buttons, or only lost socks?
- Would you rather your child insist on speaking to all animals as if they were fluent in their language, or insist on wearing their shoes on the wrong feet all day?
- Would you rather your child believe that bedtime is a suggestion and not a rule, or believe that breakfast is a formal five-course meal?
- Would you rather have your child communicate exclusively through interpretive dance, or exclusively through opera singing?
- Would you rather your child decide that they are a chef and want to cook for the family every meal, or decide that they are an artist and want to paint the walls?
- Would you rather your child have a habit of leaving cryptic notes around the house, or have a habit of leaving tiny gifts for people they’ve never met?
Parenting Partner Power Struggles: Would You Rather?
- Would you rather one parent be solely in charge of all diaper changes, but the other parent gets to choose all the baby's outfits, or one parent is solely in charge of all feeding, but the other parent gets to name the baby?
- Would you rather always be the one to get up with the baby in the middle of the night, but your partner always does all the grocery shopping, or your partner always gets to sleep in, but you always get to have the last bite of dessert?
- Would you rather one parent has to sing every lullaby in a silly voice, and the other parent has to change diapers with oven mitts on, or one parent has to pack all the diaper bags, and the other parent has to plan all the baby's playtime?
- Would you rather have to make all the baby’s meals for the week every Sunday, or have to be responsible for all the baby’s laundry every single day?
- Would you rather one parent always has to be the "fun" parent who plays games, and the other parent is always the "strict" parent who enforces rules, or one parent is always the "disciplinarian," and the other parent is always the "comforter"?
- Would you rather one parent has to be the designated story-reader who always reads in funny voices, and the other parent has to be the designated bath-time splash-maker, or one parent has to be the lullaby singer, and the other parent has to be the diaper changer?
- Would you rather have to negotiate with your baby for every nap, but your partner gets to choose all the baby's future career paths, or have to dress the baby in ridiculous outfits every day, but your partner gets to decide all the baby's bedtime stories?
- Would you rather one parent always has to sing the baby to sleep in a terrible voice, and the other parent always has to pretend to be a monster to make the baby laugh, or one parent has to do all the baby's hair, and the other parent has to give all the baby's baths?
- Would you rather one parent is always on "baby duty" during the day, and the other parent is always on "house duty" at night, or one parent is always the "playmate," and the other parent is always the "teacher"?
- Would you rather have to explain every decision you make to your baby in excruciating detail, or have your partner get to make all the major life decisions for the baby?
- Would you rather one parent has to wear a silly hat every time they interact with the baby, and the other parent has to make funny noises, or one parent has to do all the baby's laundry, and the other parent has to organize all the baby's toys?
- Would you rather one parent is always the "food procurer" and the other parent is always the "sleep inducer," or one parent is always the "boo-boo kisser," and the other parent is always the "boo-boo cleaner"?
- Would you rather have to let your baby control the TV remote for all family movie nights, or have your partner get to decide all the baby's future Halloween costumes?
- Would you rather one parent is exclusively in charge of burping the baby, and the other parent is exclusively in charge of all babyproofing, or one parent is exclusively in charge of reading bedtime stories, and the other parent is exclusively in charge of packing the diaper bag?
- Would you rather have to let your baby pick all your outfits for a week, or have your partner get to pick all the baby's future pet names?
- Would you rather one parent has to be the "hugger" and the other parent has to be the "tickler," or one parent has to be the "chaser," and the other parent has to be the "catcher"?
- Would you rather one parent is solely responsible for all baby-related messes, but the other parent gets to name all the baby's future toys, or one parent is solely responsible for all baby’s travel arrangements, but the other parent gets to decide all the baby’s musical preferences?
- Would you rather have to sing a different opera song for every diaper change, or have your partner get to decide all the baby's future hair colors?
- Would you rather one parent has to be the designated "laughter generator" and the other parent has to be the designated "comfort provider," or one parent has to be the designated "playtime planner," and the other parent has to be the designated "snack dispenser"?
- Would you rather have to let your baby decide all the family's vacation destinations, or have your partner get to decide all the baby's future fashion trends?
Firsts and Milestones: Would You Rather?
- Would you rather your baby's first word be " Dada" but they only say it when you're not around, or their first word be " Mama" but they only say it in a deep baritone voice?
- Would you rather your baby's first steps be a confident stride across the room, or a series of wobbly, dramatic falls followed by a triumphant stand?
- Would you rather your baby's first solid food be something you despise, or your baby's first solid food be something you've spent hours preparing that they immediately spit out?
- Would you rather your baby's first giggle be at your most embarrassing moment, or your baby's first giggle be so loud it startles the cat?
- Would you rather your baby's first tooth be a jagged, sharp incisor, or a tiny, perfect pearl?
- Would you rather your baby's first sentence be a profound philosophical question, or a demand for snacks?
- Would you rather your baby's first drawing be a masterpiece of abstract art that only you can interpret, or a detailed replica of your face?
- Would you rather your baby's first sound be a piercing siren, or a low, guttural growl?
- Would you rather your baby's first sign of independence be to run away from you at top speed, or to try and dress themselves in a complicated outfit?
- Would you rather your baby's first attempt at walking be while holding a full cup of water, or while wearing roller skates?
- Would you rather your baby's first word be "chaos," or your baby's first word be "order"?
- Would you rather your baby's first conscious thought be about world peace, or about what's for dinner?
- Would you rather your baby's first laugh be at your expense, or your baby's first laugh be at a complete stranger?
- Would you rather your baby's first step be towards the dog, or towards the nearest electrical outlet?
- Would you rather your baby's first solid food be something incredibly spicy, or something incredibly bitter?
- Would you rather your baby's first attempt at speech be a perfect imitation of a celebrity voice, or a perfect imitation of a cartoon character?
- Would you rather your baby's first "artwork" be made with permanent markers on the wall, or with sticky jam on the ceiling?
- Would you rather your baby's first recognizable sound be a fart noise, or a burp noise?
- Would you rather your baby's first act of rebellion be to refuse to wear pants, or to refuse to eat anything that isn't brightly colored?
- Would you rather your baby's first interaction with a mirror be to try and eat it, or to try and have a serious conversation with their reflection?
Parenthood is a grand adventure, full of unexpected twists and turns. These Would You Rather Questions For New Parents are just a fun way to navigate some of those moments, share a laugh, and remember that even the most challenging situations can be a source of joy and connection. So, next time you're feeling overwhelmed, grab a friend, grab your partner, and dive into some parent dilemmas – you might be surprised by what you learn and how much you laugh!